Sharing Stories
There’s an article in Women’s Health magazine on miscarriage (March issue, by Eryn Brown).
It's different than the article in Alternative Medicine I mentioned a few posts ago. Not as personal, but still good. The author says (in kinder words) what a crock of poop it was when the doctor told her she'd spot bleed for "several days."
My doctor fed me a similar line.
I believed him.
Try six weeks, one day, 11 hours, and counting…
It took ten weeks to build up the inner lining, so once I thought about it I realized of course it’s going to take time to bleed out – especially because I miscarried naturally (so nothing was sucked or vacuumed from my womb), but why don’t the doctors just TELL you? Jeez...
I finished reading Waiting for Daisy, Peggy Orenstein’s story of a six year battle with infertility. I love her honesty about her struggles – her guilt over deciding to wait to have a baby. And more guilt over still wanting to wait despite her challenges with fertility. And trying to figure out if it’s motherhood she’s after or just pregnancy.
My own story of miscarriage found a home, so I'll post a link to it when it's in print.
Next on my list is Rebecca Walker’s Baby Love. If I'm not mistaken, I think it addresses her ambivalence about desiring motherhood.
posted by Jenny at 9:58 AM
6 Comments:
Can't wait to read your perspective.
I love how you think about the bleeding time. You're right, of course, but many doctors (esp. male ones) are frightened to talk to women about bleeding, especially after trauma. Go figure!
1:35 PM
I had the same thing after I miscarried naturally: I bled for weeks longer than they said I would. Plus, I had to go back 3 times for sonograms before they could finally confirm that everything was "gone" so we could start trying again, and my (now former) doctor didn't return my calls once. I will definitely be reading your piece!
I'm so sorry you had to go through this tough experience, and I send you loads of good wishes and positive energy.
7:44 PM
A friend here lost a baby about the same time you did.
After, the doctor waltzed in the room all peppy and told her "Well, you did a great job getting rid of it. We won't have to do a D & C."
Soooooo insensitive.
Many women will recognize themselves in your story. I know I did.
Wishing you continued healing and a big hug from here.
8:56 PM
Oh, Jenny, how awful. So sorry you have insult to injury. Glad you're able to write about it.
5:15 AM
I'll be going to a book signing for Peggy on Monday. I'm really excited to meet her--she's an excellent writer. Will be interested to see where your story has ended up and look forward to reading that as well. I'm sorry that you had to go through a miscarriage.
3:15 PM
I hear you, Jenny. I did a long and painful dance with infertility and had a miscarriage, too. I'm so sorry you're going through this.
Despite that sadness, I'm thrilled to hear your story found a home and look forward to reading it.
7:29 PM
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