Decisions, Decisions

Writing this blog is like walking a balance beam.

How much to share? How much to share?

Too much and I come across as unprofessional.
Not enough and Zzzzzz (it’s boring).

Let me just say this: If you ever find yourself pregnant, and the sonogram technician tells you the baby’s heartbeat stopped, and your doctor says you have two options – to miscarry naturally or to schedule a D&C – opt for the D&C.

I hemmed and hawed over my alternatives.

“There’s something I appreciate about allowing my body to do what it would naturally do,” I remember saying.

Cringe.

Actually, I did arrange for a D&C. Other women convinced me it was quick, painless, and might be a good idea to give my uterus a thorough cleaning. But I never made it to the appointed date and hour. My body miscarried naturally late one night (well, over two nights, but that’s another story).

As I squirmed on the cold bathroom tile, gritting my teeth as my uterus squeezed with contractions, I had two thoughts:

1. I hope I never find myself at the mercy of a Python snake.
2. If I’m ever pregnant again and carry the child to term, I’m getting an epidural.

Last week the doctor told me the emotional pain of a miscarriage would far outweigh the physical pain.

He must’ve been talking long term.

Anyway, I’m fine now and relieved it’s over. To any women who have delivered a baby by any means (natural, drugs, C-section) – I have a whole new respect for you!