Welcome to My Flap

Welcome to my flap.

That's the first line in Amy Sedaris' new book, I Like You.

Actually, it's the first line of the inside cover of the book jacket, or in Amy's words, the flap.

Let me say, I am SO picky about books. If the first line doesn't grab me, I'll put it down. My theory: it's not the story that makes a book interesting, it’s the writing.

Sometimes I think my "Test" is harsh and unfair (gosh, please don't apply that silly idea to this blog!), so I'll read the entire first paragraph. If the book doesn't grab me after five to seven whole sentences, adios. No book for me (for the record, my book-buying method has been pretty successful over the years).

Point is, I read Amy Sedaris' first line and I was hooked. Nobody can make me laugh out loud when I'm in a serious mood and I was in a serious mood, darn it! I know nothing about this woman except that my mom thinks she's funny and she is related to David Sedaris.

At home I realized I paid $27.99 for a book that I knew zilch about.

I looked at the picture on the cover. A woman who I presume is Amy holding a cooked turkey. I read the subtitle. Something about hospitality.

Oh no. Was this book going to be about the kitchen and stuff? I am no Martha Stewart. In fact, my fridge is so bare I had to leave the house to buy a veggie sandwich at a cafe, which happened to be within walking distance from the bookstore . . .

Anyway, I kept trying to figure out what the book was about but I couldn’t make it to the first page. I was caught up in the funny flap.

Oh, crap.

A COOKBOOK?

You know what? I don’t even mind. My theory is still holding together so far because I’m dying to read this book and I hate to cook. And I’m excited that the book is fat. It makes me happy because when I find a book I love I never want it to end. So goodbye, I'm off to read.